Everybody has blue days.


These are miserable days when you feel lousy, grumpy, lonely, and utterly exhausted.


Days when you feel small and insignificant,


When everything seems just out of reach,


You can’t rise to the occasion.


Just getting started seems impossible.


On blue days you can become paranoid that everyone is out to get you.


This is not always such a bad thing.


You feel frustrated and anxious, which can induce a nail-biting frenzy that can escalate into a triple-chocolate-mud-cake-eating frenzy in a blink of an eye!


On blue days you feel like you’re floating in an ocean of sadness.


You’re about to burst into tears at any moment and you don’t even know why.


You’re not sure how much longer you can hang on,


And you feel like shouting, “Will someone please shout me!”


It doesn’t take much to bring on a blue day.


You might just wake up not feeling or looking your best,


Find some new wrinkles, put on a little weight, or get a huge pimple on your nose.


You could forget your date’s name or have an embarrassing photograph published.


You might get dumped, divorced, or fired, make a fool of yourself in public, be afflicted with a demeaning nickname,


Or just have a plain old bad-hair day.


Maybe work is a pain in the butt.


You’re under major pressure to fill someone else’s shoes.


Your boss is picking on you,


And everyone in the office is driving you crazy.


You might have a splitting headache,


Or a slipped dish, bad breath, a toothache, chronic gas, dry lips,


Or a nasty ingrown toenail.


Whatever the reason, you’re convinced that someone up there doesn’t like you.


Oh what to do, what to do?


Well, if you’re like most people,


You’ll hide behind a flimsy belief that everything will sort itself out.


Then you’ll spend the rest of your life looking over your shoulder,


Waiting for everything to go wrong all over again.


All the while become crusty and cynical or a pathetic, sniveling victim.


Until you get so depressed that you lie down and beg the earth to swallow you up or, even worse, become addicted to Billy Joel songs.


This is crazy,


Because you’re only young once and you’re never old twice.

參考譯文
心情憂郁時(shí) 別在悲傷的海里沉浮
每個(gè)人都有憂郁的日子。
那些日子真是慘透了，你覺(jué)得心里亂糟糟的、怨氣叢生、寂寞、整個(gè)人徹底的精疲力竭。
那些日子總會(huì)讓你感到自己的渺小和微不足道，
每件事情似乎都?jí)虿恢叀?br>你根本無(wú)法振作起來(lái)。
根本沒(méi)有力氣重新開始。
在憂郁的日子里，你可能變成偏執(zhí)狂，覺(jué)得每個(gè)人都想要吃定你。
其實(shí)情況并不總是那么糟。
你感到灰心、焦慮，可能開始神經(jīng)質(zhì)地拼命咬指甲，然后不可救藥地陷入一眨眼吃掉三大塊巧克力蛋糕的瘋狂！
在憂郁的日子里，你會(huì)覺(jué)得自己在悲傷的海里沉沉浮浮。
不論在什么時(shí)候，你總有種想哭的沖動(dòng)，卻不知道為了什么。
最后，你覺(jué)得自己猶如行尸走肉，失去生活目標(biāo)。
你不知道自己還可以撐多久，
然后你想大喊一聲：“誰(shuí)來(lái)一槍把我打死吧！”
其實(shí)一點(diǎn)小事就讓你一天都郁悶難當(dāng)。
也許只是一覺(jué)醒來(lái)，沒(méi)有感覺(jué)到或者看到自己最棒的一面，
發(fā)現(xiàn)自己又多了幾條皺紋，又重了幾斤，或是鼻子上冒出了一個(gè)大包。
你可能忘記了約會(huì)對(duì)象的名字，或是有張可笑的照片被登出來(lái)。
你或許被人拋棄、離了婚，或是被開除，當(dāng)眾出丑，被刻薄的綽號(hào)弄得心亂如麻，
或許只因?yàn)槟愕谜祉斨粋€(gè)其丑無(wú)比的發(fā)型。
也許工作讓你痛苦得如坐針氈。
你在強(qiáng)大的壓力下頂替他人的位置，
你的老板對(duì)你百般挑剔，
辦公室里的每一個(gè)人都讓你發(fā)瘋。
你可能會(huì)頭疼欲裂，
或重心不穩(wěn)跌個(gè)正著，口臭、牙痛、不停放屁、口干舌燥，
或是指甲長(zhǎng)到肉里頭了。
不管什么原因，你確定上面有人不喜歡你。
唉，該怎么辦，到底該怎么辦呢？
嗯，你可能跟大部分人一樣，
隨便找個(gè)東西躲起來(lái),以為事情會(huì)自行解決。
結(jié)果你得花掉下半輩子的時(shí)間回頭看，
等著一次有一次重蹈覆轍。
最后你會(huì)變成一個(gè)易怒的、憤世嫉俗的，或者是 一個(gè)可憐兮兮的、哭哭啼啼的受害者。
最終你絕望地躺在地上，祈求地球?qū)⒛阃虥](méi)，或是沉迷在比利.喬的藍(lán)調(diào)音樂(lè)中不能自拔。
這的確很蠢,
因?yàn)槟阒荒苣贻p一次，而且絕對(duì)不可能老兩次。