Every time you go on a date, you're faced with 347 "rules" on how to act, what to say, when to call him, when to kiss him and how to play "the game." We're done with that. Dating rules are dead. The rules say that you should Always do this and Never do that, but our take is this: Never trust a rule that begins with "Never," and always question a rule that begins with "Always."
每次你去約會(huì)，對(duì)于如何表現(xiàn)、說什么、何時(shí)打電話給他、何時(shí)吻他以及如何玩“愛情游戲”，你要面對(duì)347“規(guī)則”。我們受夠了那些。約會(huì)規(guī)則是死的。規(guī)則說你總是應(yīng)該這樣做，永遠(yuǎn)別那樣做，但我們的建議是這樣的：永遠(yuǎn)不要相信“從不”開頭的規(guī)則，總是質(zhì)疑一下以“總是”開頭的規(guī)則。

10 ways traditional rules can ruin a date
10條毀掉約會(huì)的傳統(tǒng)規(guī)則

1.They make you less authentic.

Rules like "Men Love Bitches" have a sneaky way of making us play a game, put on an act and avoid being our true selves. But if you're dating someone, shouldn't they, well, sort of like your true self?
1.他們讓你沒那么真實(shí)。

就像“男人愛賤人”的規(guī)則以一種卑鄙的方式讓我們游戲其中，裝模作樣，避免真實(shí)的自我。但如果你和別人約會(huì)，難道他們就一點(diǎn)不你真實(shí)的自己?jiǎn)幔?/p>

2.They make you over-think.

Dating should be fun. But how can you relax when you're counting the hours between calls, the days between dates, and whether he's following Rule 1138?
2.他們讓你想的過多。

約會(huì)應(yīng)該是快樂的。但當(dāng)你在每個(gè)電話之間數(shù)著幾個(gè)小時(shí)，每次約會(huì)之間數(shù)著日子，以及他是否遵循1138號(hào)規(guī)則，你怎么能放松？

2. They're unrealistic.

Example: We've all heard the rule that you should "never date a co-worker." Only problem? The rule is blind to reality. 38% of working adults will have an office romance. So, instead of saying "Never Do It," it's more helpful to focus on strategies of how to do it well.
3．他們是不現(xiàn)實(shí)的。

例如：我們都聽過這樣的規(guī)則，你應(yīng)該“絕不約會(huì)同事?！蔽ㄒ坏膯栴}嗎？這條規(guī)則無視生活。38%的成年人將有一場(chǎng)辦公室戀情。因此，不是說“絕不這樣做”，注重策略如何做好才更有幫助。

4. They weed out people you might actually like.

Maybe that guy a few cubicles over -- or the one who lives across the country -- isn't a practical person for you to date, but since when is love practical? The Rules make you doubt your instinct to take risks, and it's hard to find love when you're playing it safe.
4．他們淘汰你可能會(huì)喜歡的人

也許那個(gè)就在幾個(gè)隔間不遠(yuǎn)處的家伙，或一個(gè)全國出差的人——不是你該約會(huì)的現(xiàn)實(shí)對(duì)象，但什么時(shí)候愛情是實(shí)際的了？這些規(guī)則使你懷疑你冒險(xiǎn)的本能，但你謹(jǐn)慎行事時(shí)很難找到真愛。

5. They make you assume "He's just not that into you."

This rule makes you dump a guy at the first sign of trouble. True, certain red flags mean you should bolt, but sometimes, he just really is that busy.
5．他們讓你認(rèn)為“他只是沒那么喜歡你。”

這條規(guī)則讓你在一有麻煩跡象的時(shí)候甩掉那個(gè)家伙。真的，某些危險(xiǎn)信號(hào)意味著你應(yīng)該逃離，但有時(shí)，他就真的那么忙。6. The traditional rule of "The man should take her to dinner" can backfire.

Dinners can be weird. You have no escape, you fret over what you should order and whether it's in the socially acceptable price range (pasta or steak?), and then, finally: Stomachs. They exist and they have consequences.
6．“男人應(yīng)該帶她去吃飯”的傳統(tǒng)規(guī)則可能適得其反。

晚餐可能是奇怪的。你無法逃脫，你擔(dān)心你應(yīng)該點(diǎn)什么，是否在社會(huì)可接受的價(jià)格范圍內(nèi)(意大利面還是牛排?)，然后，最終：胃。他們就在那以及他們會(huì)有問題。

7. They leech the fun out of dating.

In the sequel to The Rules, authors Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider even offer a grid -- yes, a grid -- that tells you exactly how much time to wait before texting him back, based on when he texts and how old you are. There's nothing fun about a grid.
7．他們剝奪了約會(huì)的樂趣。

在《規(guī)則》續(xù)集中，作者Ellen Fein和Sherrie Schneider甚至提供了一個(gè)網(wǎng)格——是的，網(wǎng)格——告訴你在回他短信之前到底要等多久，基于他什么時(shí)候發(fā)短信以及你多大了。關(guān)于這個(gè)網(wǎng)格沒有什么有趣。

8. They're prudish.

Okay, let's address our book's title: It's Okay to Sleep with Him on the First Date: and Every Other Rule of Dating, Debunked. No one's saying that you should hook up on the first date. But if you want to? Go for it. (The guy's not going to "lose respect," and if he does, he's a hypocrite.) We've heard countless stories where people have hooked up on the first date and then eventually gotten married.
8。他們是假正經(jīng)。

好吧，讓我們重申我們書的標(biāo)題：《第一次約會(huì)和他睡覺沒事：揭秘約會(huì)的其他規(guī)則》。沒有人說在第一次約會(huì)時(shí)你應(yīng)該上鉤。但是如果你想？去吧。(這家伙不會(huì)“失去尊重”，如果他這樣做，他是一個(gè)偽君子。)人們第一次約會(huì)就上鉤，然后最終結(jié)婚這樣的故事我們已經(jīng)聽過無數(shù)。

9. They're sexist.

The rules spawn from an era when the woman's only job was to make sure the meatloaf was ready by 7 p.m., when we didn't have to worry about nonsense like "equal rights," when you could puff cigarettes when you're pregnant and when we had to follow rules like "Find a man who makes more money than you." Ugh.
9．他們是性別歧視。

女人唯一的工作就是確保烘肉卷7點(diǎn)前準(zhǔn)備好的時(shí)代這些規(guī)則就產(chǎn)生了。當(dāng)我們不用擔(dān)心“平等權(quán)利”這樣的胡說八道，當(dāng)你懷孕了可以吸煙，當(dāng)我們不得不遵循“找一個(gè)比你賺錢多的人”的規(guī)則時(shí)。呃。

10. They spread fear.

Most traditional rules are fear-based. You'll screw it up if you kiss him too soon! He won't like you if you pursue! Our take is a little more straightforward: Don't trust The Rules, trust yourself.
10．他們傳播恐懼。

大多數(shù)傳統(tǒng)規(guī)則是基于恐懼。如果你吻他太早你會(huì)把約會(huì)搞砸！如果你主動(dòng)追求他不會(huì)喜歡你！我們的建議是一個(gè)更直接一點(diǎn)：別相信規(guī)則，相信你自己。